Today I ponder Valentine’s Day. It is a day when the ladies turn to thoughts of love and men wonder what they should get for their ladies to keep them out of trouble. Candy is good but not good. Flowers are always good but do red roses send the wrong message? How mushy should the card be? Many men experience temporary amnesia and do nothing at all. A lot of people claim that Valentin’s day is another of those made up holidays intended to sell greeting cards. Not so.
St. Valentine’s Day dates back to around 500AD when Pope Gelasius declared February 14th a Christian feast day to offset the mid winter Roman pagan festival of Lupercalia. But it was Chaucer in the 14th century that made it the holiday for love with his poem celebrating the engagement of England’s King Richard II and Anne of Bohemia (cue Freddy Mercury and Queen). Since then the date has evolved into an occasion for the giving of gifts and the making of hand-made cards (remember grade school). Naturally the commercial greeting card industry knew a good thing when it saw it and today we have whole isles at the pharmacy devoted to love on card stock.
Like most men I am mostly confused by Valentine’s Day. As noted above, candy is out. I sometimes get flowers but have been told in the past that it is a waste of money as they die quickly (aren’t they already dead?) and end up in the trash. I thought maybe a potted plant would be good, but for some reason that has never really gone over too great. I have tried the stuffed animal route on occasion, but again that didn’t really seem to hit the spot. Dinner and a movie is good when Valentine’s Day falls on a Friday or Saturday, but still doesn’t cut it somehow.
Jewelry stores think that men should get their significant other a charm for the charm bracelet, or some other expensive trinket (of course they do). Here in Austin there is a company that thinks a lawn care contract is a great Valentine’s Day gift. “Hey honey, I’m going out to mow your Valentine’s Day gift…again!” All kinds of merchants horn in on the holiday of love: mattress sales (okay, I can kinda see that one), car and truck sales, a day at the spa (not bad), beer and wine (to get her in the mood?), and lotsa others.
I personally get my lady love three valentine cards. One is humorous and is usually the easiest to find. Another is ostensibly from our two cats. It usually features some animal professing undying love – at least until feeding time. The third card is the killer. It is usually filled with sonorous words of love, affection, pent-up desire and promises. It usually wins me a hug a soppy kiss and….well you know.
In the end Valentine’s Day is just a day. If you love your love, and they love you back, then you don’t need a special day to show it. An occasional surprise card, or small gift, or tickle in the hallway sends a far greater message than flowers on the day of love. But take heed. That does not mean that you should skip the card or flowers.